Most workplaces have an office clown. That person that loves a little mischief, a little drama to spice up the mundanity of the 9 to 5. It’s a tough job, walking the line between lovable rogue and annoying nuisance, but someone’s gotta do it right? Because no matter what, it’s entertaining at least (unless it’s you on the end of the practical jokes).
Bored Panda has compiled a list of devilishly clever office pranks that get dangerously close to crossing the line. Scroll down to check them out below, add your own stories if you want to share them and don’t forget to vote for your favorite!
One of my Co-Worker has a ton of family pictures all over his desk and walls. I was slowly changing them all to pictures of me. I worked really hard to find similar pictures to replace them. I even traveled to some of the places to replicate them. I just about had them all when another guy we worked with asked him why he had so many pictures of me. He thought this married guy had a crush on me or something.
This is only to my bosses, but when I know I’m due for a raise/promotion and they tell me they don’t have budget/I need to wait a while, I start wearing suits to work. Not everyday, but maybe once a week, maybe twice, skip a few, repeat.
Looks like you’re going to interviews during lunch or after work.
Made a new folder on his desktop called Russian Dwarf Porn and then took a screenshot. Set the screenshot as his desktop background.
For an engineer it took him a ridiculous amount of time before he realised why he couldn’t delete the folder.
Everyday I would get into the locker room before him and place one penny in his right boot. This went on for 2 months. After about a week and a half I could see him getting frustrated. After a while it just became the norm for him to shake the penny out of his right boot everyday. He wasn’t frustrated anymore, he was defeated, and just accepted it now. So, one day I decided to put it in his left boot. He came in shook his right boot out like usual, but nothing fell out. He looked so relieved, like a huge weight had been lifted. Then he put on his left boot on, and just f*ckin lost it. He slung that boot across the locker room with all his might, cussing and calling out whoever did this to him. I stopped f*cking with him after that. I plan on putting a penny in his boot once a year from now on just to remind him. Nobody knows it was me placing the penny and I plan on keeping it that way.
I have hidden a tiny speaker in an adjacent cubicle wall that emits a soft cat meow every 2 hours.
I teach elementary music. Once, I had a rivalry with the gym/PE teacher. She would send the kindergarten class to mine and tell them it was my birthday and I loved birthday hugs. She would do this about twice a month. I sent them back to her and told them she loved it when people would step on her foot. They rushed her and started stomping. She also told the kids to go into my class, say nothing, and just stare at me. It was the creepiest damn thing. She won.
I installed “cloud to butt” on my coworker’s pc.
It’s a Chrome addon that changes all instances of the word “cloud” being displayed to “butt”.
He didn’t notice for months. Last week he finally asked me what that customer could possibly mean by “uploading files to my butt”.
Every time this one girl mentions something her kids did, I mention something my dog did.
You know how you can fray Duct tape and pull off long little sticky threads of it?
So I pulled off a single long piece of it, and put it down the side of my manager’s brand new car. Looks like a deep, horrifying scratch on the paintwork.
The look on his face when we went out for a smoke. He threw his hands onto his head, his knees went weak and he basically crawled over to it, and pulled the thread of sticky duct tape off easily.
Harmless and fun, that one.
Grabbed a roll of stickers from the pharmacy that say “For rectal use only” and randomly attach them to pens, phones, staplers, the water cooler.
It’s all good till our director comes in and loses his shit and can’t help but laugh.
Change their auto-correct settings in Outlook so when they type their name it adds a ridiculous title.
Tom Smith = His eloquence, master of ceremonial duck herding, and debater of microwave etiquette, Thomas “The Velvet Hammer” Smith, Esq.
Not me, but a guy I know. He stole a coworker’s novelty giant pencil, then started emailing said coworker in-character as the pencil, with photos of the pencil in different locations around Europe.
He even got another coworker in on the act to deflect suspicion away from himself, and used proxies to ensure the emails couldn’t be traced back to him.
The original owner of the pencil got so pissed off, it initiated a company-wide hunt for the perpetrator. So far as I know, it was never resolved, and Pencil McPencilface roams the world to this day.
My coworkers think I have a cat. I’ve named him Winston.
I’ve pleasantly avoided many after-work happy hours and other work events with “I have to get home and feed the cat”.
I even have a photo of some random cat on my phone in case anyone inquires further.
I don’t have a cat, of course. But I do chuckle to myself at the thought of Winston, My Imaginary Cat.
I worked on the seventh floor of an office building. Everyone in the building would try and leave on the elevators at 5 pm, every single day. The elevator would stop at EVERY single floor and when the doors would open, we would see a line up of people looking disappointed, the doors would close and we would move on. This happened even on the second floor.
when the door would open, everyone in the situation would stare at each other and be paralyzed with social anxiety about the right thing to do.
One particularly busy Friday, the doors open on the sixth floor, and I announced to the usual line up: â€˜we have enough room for one of youâ€™. One person got on, the doors closed, someone behind me chuckled, and we went on to the 5th floor. When the doors opened, I said â€˜we can only take two of youâ€™. People in the elevator moved back and squished, two people got on, and we picked up one more person per floor. By the time we got to the 2nd floor, the elevator was shoulder to shoulder, bodies touching, but for some reason, people were still listening to me. A lady next to me looked worried that I would invite more people on. The doors opened on the second floor and the people waiting looked at an extremely packed elevator. To them I said â€˜take the stairs, youâ€™re on the second f*cking floor.â€™
That got a good laugh.
I whistle Christmas songs in months other than December. Just the first few lines once or twice an hour. Give it a few hours and they’re questioning why jingle bells is stuck in their head mid June.
Our old HR director was notorious for having a messy desk. My manager and I made it our mission to add an additional 1,000 random sheets of paper to his desk over the course of a few weeks without him noticing. Every morning he’d come in and 10-15 more sheets would be added to the mess. It took a long time for him to suspect something was up.
I think I’ve mentioned this before, but I have a few co-workers (myself included) that run on post-it notes. Seriously, some of our desks look like that Pepe Silva scene in Always Sunny.
That said, I take advantage of this. I do fairly well at copying other’s handwriting. I’ll do my best facsimile of something innocuous or mildly ominous and place it among their other post-its.
My notable favorites were: “Ask Linda about the bees.” and “Knife Parade?”
Not me, but my husband’s story. They had a candy dispenser in their work area that made a particular noise when it dispensed candy. Well, he noticed that a particular employee would, whenever he heard the somone else getting candy, would get up and get himself some candy. Like a Pavlovian response to the sound.
So he did what anyone would do, recorded the sound and rigged a speaker up. Randomly throughout the day he would make the sound go off and sure enough, his coworker would get up and go get himself candy.
Slowly add new post it notes to their desk, among their real ones, that say â€œUrgent! Call _put another co-workers number here_â€. Sometimes a word like â€œevaluationâ€ or â€œmeetingâ€ or upcoming dates and times causes hilarious interactions. If you plant three different notes that cause three people to go into a meeting at the same time itâ€™s fun to see how long they stay before realizing there is no meeting.
The former big boss of my oil plant works in the office with me. I noticed anytime I would mention an interesting storey he would immidiatly fact check it and point out how wrong I was. So, If I wanted to know something , rather than look it up myself, I would just throw out a claim. Me- xyz stock is $4.40 today Him- NO ITS NOT – its $2.17
Me – Thank you
Me- Chicago is a 8 hour drive from here. Him- NO ITS NOT – its 12 if you do Route A, and 10.5 if you go Route B ect,
We have this old crotchy hyper religious nut at my job. Very annoying, sits on her butt all day. I put a remote control speaker, loaded a 30kb sound file of demonic voices whispering.
When she starts hearing and looking around, I cut it off with the remote. Ive been doing this shit for years. She keeps adding more bible calandars to ward “it” off. Taking this one to the grave, Cathy, you cunt.
I made 20 copies of a paperclip and put them in the paper tray of copier. A woman in my office made a copy and got the paperclip in the pictures and thought there was a paperclip in the copy machine somewhere. She was searching and searching and even went and got a flashlight and started looking everywhere in the machine. She was opening up drawers and panels for 20 minutes. It was pretty fun to watch.
Once I plugged in a wireless mouse into their computer without them knowing. And a few times a day I would just jiggle the mouse. Just enough to hear them slamming down the mouse and muttering under their breath and I’d stop. This went on for several days. Sometimes I’d stop by to chat, and I would bring the mouse. When they we go to click on something I would just move the mouse just slightly so they couldn’t actually hover over what they wanted to click. It was brilliant!
Iâ€™m a 28 year old dude and I used to put up one new kitten photograph in my cubicle per week to see if any of my managers would say anything. After putting up enough pictures to cover my whole cube wall, and no one commenting, I started to feel like I was going crazy. I guess the joke was on me, or else all my managers were just super accepting.
Found a little script a while back that would randomly open and close the disc drive on my coworker’s computer. Not incredibly often, but enough to the point where it was annoying. He requested a new computer, I reinstalled the .scr as soon as he left that day.
Coworker. I have very tiny printouts of just his head. I sneak them all over the office in inconspicuous places. This has been going on for 2 years. He still doesn’t know it’s me.
My coworker has many allergies, most of which are made up in her mind. If she hears of a new allergy she instantly has that allergy too. She is “allergic” to all cleaning supplies. We are not allowed to use any cleaners in our cubicles because it will make her sick. When she’s really annoying me I will spray a bottle of water in my cube. She will hear the sound of the spray bottle and within half an hour she will go home “sick” because someone was spraying “cleaners” in the office.
Long time ago I worked the late night/closing shift at a convenience store/gas station. Another co-worker and I closed up around 11 each night.
I amused myself by taking a little white ziploc type baggie… or sometimes a piece of plastic wrap… and would put sugar or a sugar substitute in it, then wander out just before closing and drop it by the pumps. Looked like a customer had their nose candy fall out of their pocket when they’d pulled out their keys or wallet or whatever.
Then I’d watch as whomever I was working with would go out to shut down and lock up the pumps. I’d look distracted but would watch as they’d spot it, look around, look at me, then subtly reach down and pick it up as they “tied their shoe” or “picked up change” something. Then of course they’d volunteer to clean the bathrooms so they could privately check out their new coke stash. Good times.
Of course, sometimes a customer would find it first, then come in and get the bathroom key. Even better times.
My department is pretty small, so when we f*ck with someone, everyone is involved.
We have a tradition to set up elaborate pranks for one of us returns from vacation, with the crown jewel being an office poltergeist we staged.
We threw in a bait-and-switch and adorably made the desk a beach scene, complete with a cardboard cutout of Justin Bieber in scuba gear, a kiddie pool with sand, and a crafty palm tree. About a few hours into her shift, shit got real.
See, the rest of her desk was seemingly normal. However, behind the scenes, there was fishing wire connected to different objects on her desk, with the other ends spread across the rest of our desks attached to pens, activating an â€˜eventâ€™ with a tug of a pen. There was an instant messaging group where we planned on real time behind the scenes.
For the next few hours, in intervals of about 20 minutes, things on her desk started to move. A rose we had bought for her flew at her, a tack holding up a corner of a calendar loosened, her mouse moved, drawers opened, etc.
This started subtle, and got more and more ridiculous as the day played out. The end of the poltergeist, however, is when we suckered someone in Accounting to remove a panel in the corner of her cubicle and roll a ball through the cracks with a picture of the victimâ€™s face taped to the ball.
We have yet to top this one.
Back in the day, our office IT was…..less than modern day standards shall we say. Basically every single PC had admin rights. It was chaos for our poor IT admin guy, but he was semi-retired so didn’t give too much of a shit.
Right click on desktop, create new shortcut, type shutdown.exe -I and you have created one of the best chaos creation tools I’ve ever employed. Double-click on this, and you can select any computer on the network and have it re-start or shutdown, with an optional countdown timer and pop-up message. You just need your victim’s IP address and admin rights.
This was commonly deployed against the fresh-faced work experience kids as hardened office veterans would smell a rat quickly. My favourite was to wait until they were an hour or so into work, then send a shutdown command with the warning pop-up, “Windows has detected a ridiculous hair-cut, and will shutdown in 10 seconds.”
The panicked look of desperation was priceless. They rarely said anything, as how do you tell all these grown-ups that the PC shut down because of…..their hair cut.
Yes I’m going to hell. I’ve made my peace with that.
I sent a co-worker I loathed a manila envelope full of glitter. She prompted tore it open.
That was two years ago, and she still finds glitter everywhere. Our lil office fairy.
When I worked at Burger King we had new employees look for charcoal for the gas grill.
I screen shot their desktops, put all their shortcuts in one folder, then set that screen shot as their wallpaper. I find it amusing listening to their call to IT.
I like to incorrectly correct peopleâ€™s pronunciation. Like theyâ€™ll say beignet â€œben-yayâ€ and Iâ€™ll say, â€œactually, itâ€™s â€˜bang-yetâ€™.â€
Most of the time itâ€™s obvious Iâ€™m just messing with them or they already know the schtick and they laugh it off. But every so often Iâ€™ll actually convince someone theyâ€™re wrong. And itâ€™s glorious. Itâ€™s a pretty low success rate but when you hear someone use the wrong pronunciation in a conversation months later and you know you did that, it makes it all worth it.
Leaving stickie notes on their desk that says “Come see me” but no sign as to who its from.
This genuinely just happened.
My company has just moved to a new office, and everybody’s internal phone number has changed. I kindly print everyone a little phone extension matrix, about the size of half a page of A4. Everyone says thanks and sticks it to their PC monitor so we can transfer calls / call colleagues etc.
One guy in the office, probably in his 40s, really nice dude but a little bit old school sits a couple of seats away from me is selected as my victim.
After he’s gone home one night I print out 10 new versions of the phone extension matrix, each one a font size smaller than the last, cutting the paper size so everything is to scale, just smaller. Every other day I replace his piece of paper stuck to his desk until it’s practically unreadable.
Dude didn’t even notice for about 2 weeks before we saw his squinting at it when he tried to transfer a call. Still we said nothing, come in the next day to find him printing off a regular size one himself. Lunchtime comes and I replace his new one with a full sheet of A3.
Finally he twigs. Great stuff would recommend.
I just keep handing them random items. 99% of the time they’ll keep accepting.
Or I’ll stare at a spot slightly above their eye, like they have a booger on their face or something.
Or I’ll slowly back up as we talk, see how far I can get them to follow me before they catch on.
There was this girl sitting next to me in an open plan office and we were always joking with each other. One day, she had a meeting scheduled at her desk with a male coworker I knew she had a crush on. So while she was in the bathroom getting ready, I went on her PC, found the guy’s photo on the company website and made it her desktop background. Then I tabbed back to whatever programme she had been using so she wouldn’t notice right away. She comes back. Guy arrives for the meeting. They’re talking away for about ten minutes before she goes to check something on the computer and just let an enormous shriek out of her and goes bright red when she sees the desktop.
In a way, that prank almost worked too well. Because her shock was so obviously genuine, it was obvious she was the victim of a prank (rather than a crazy stalker, which is what I was aiming for.)
They sometimes leave their personal spotify accounts on the shared computer that we all use, so in the past, I’ve added things like Barney the Dinosaur and Teletubbie tracks into their libraries.
For a while my favourite thing was to unplug their mouse & put a sticky under the mouse sensor.
Was great when people plugged it back it and it still didn’t work…
I plant evil questions in their lectures and tutorials, seeding them to students we have in common.
I’ve been doing it for years, and they have no idea it’s happening. They’re just constantly baffled that the same kids each year keep asking obscure, graduate-level, often borderline unanswerable questions in person, but never quite manage that level of insight in their writing.
Put a strip of scotch tape on the underside of their computer mouse.
It’s transparent enough that the mouse will still function, it will just kind of suck and annoy them slightly for the rest of the day. They likely won’t even notice, just be subconsciously frustrated.
Add an additional strip each day until they notice.
We have network-connected (Polycom) phones. I ‘hack into’ (translation: they don’t know how to set passwords) their phones and change their wallpapers and/or ringtones. One girl is very skittish; I changed her to B-movie horror screams. Changed my supervisor’s ringtone to “It’s Raining Men”, and he’s as straight as a rail. To this day, they don’t know who keeps changing it.
I may or may not have convinced several people including our secretary that I lack the ability to read. When asked how I’ve gotten this far (5 years of undergrad and halfway through a master’s program), I confidently state that I memorize the shapes and fake it.
Many years ago I had collected money from the staff for a holiday party and left it on my desk. I went to the bathroom and came back to find the money missing. I was freaking out about the missing money searching with my boss who was disappointed I left it unattended. I was seconds away from accusing these guys working on the lights in the office when my phone rang with a devious laugh on the other end saying “missing something?”. It was a coworker from upstairs, she thought it was hilarious, I knew the gauntlet had been thrown. I went online and bought something called the annoyotron. It was a magnetic little device that I stuck under her desk that would make beeps intermittently every 10 to 15 minutes I think (it had various settings). For the next month I would find reasons to go by her desk and say “did you just hear a beep?”. She would go wide eyes and say “OMG yes! I can’t figure it out! It’s driving me crazy”. Sometimes I would go by and they would have a maintenance guy checking the fire alarm and I would just keep egging her on “I swear I just heard a beep”. So after a month of this torture we were at the annual holiday party and I was seated with her and had knocked a couple back. I spilled the beans and apologized to the person she shared a cubicle with as she was “collateral damage”. She never f*cked with me again.
During Halloween somebody brought in a bunch of plastic cockroaches and spiders for decoration. I’ve kept a bunch of them and when my coworker isn’t there I hide them around her desk. In her stationary bag, under her laptop, in the pocket of her coat. Many of them she finds and throws my way with a disapproving scoff, but every now and then the office silence is broken by a loud shriek.
Gradually increase the pressure required to open the office door by adjusting the automatic door-closer with a screwdriver so they become accustomed to giving it a mighty shove then one day disconnect the arm altogether.
Putting googly eyes on something and wondering how many days until they notice.
Reply all to say “tank you,” then reply all again to your previous reply all to say “*thank”
If anybody complains about using reply all, reply all to apologize for using reply all.
In my first job out of college I worked at a small tech company. One of the bosses was a very sweet woman. She had borrowed pens a few times and forgot to give them back. At one point one of my coworkers accused her of intentionally hording pens because they knew she would be embarrassed.
Thus began the gas lighting.
I began to steal every pen in office over the course of a month (100+ pens). I targeted the specific people who had made the original joke to make sure that there was good visibility to the prank. I made sure that the nicer pens that people associate as “theirs” were always specifically found in her desk. She would always deny it only to find them right there.
Christmas rolls around and we have the company Christmas party. I package up the pens for the white elephant gift exchange making sure to place my present in the exchange pile without having anyone see who placed it there. When it’s opened the room explodes with laughter and accusations.
Helped my friend move an entire cubical up a space. It was difficult because they wanted it to be perfect not like they just switched desks. To achieve it we actually took the cubical apart and moved the walls so none of the decorations moved even an inch, next we took up the 9 carpet squares (why I was brought it) and switched them that way the big coffee stain and whiteout explosion stayed.
Everyone then shuffled so guy in seat one was now in 2, 2 in 3, … 20 in one’s spot. Now the only thing to cue him off was that his cubical was directly under the fan and he hated being cold.
A friend told me he worked for 2 days before starting to claim that they moved the fan. took him almost a month to notice that the “other row shifted because the guy directly next to him before was now one desk back”. During this time he started wearing jackets and sweaters because of the fan.
Not me, but while my mom was still at work she was in charge of taking the minutes during meetings. She worked at a private training institute, anyway. Her director of studies had this huge moustache that made it hard for people to understand him while he was talking. When she approached retirement age she started replacing the directors “words” in the minutes with bullet type pictures of moustaches. No one ever noticed, proving further that no one ever read the minutes. We have a good laugh about it now and then. She also replaced all the instances of the word “docs” around the office (like tracking docs) to “dogs”. Once again. No one noticed.
We moved all items on a friend’s desk to the left half an inch each day after lunch. Originally his computer was pointed into the cube’s corner. Eventually it was far along one side of the cube and bunching his knees up against the desk cabinets. We even slowly moved all his tacked-up cube wall papers. He didn’t figure it out until he was unable to sit comfortably.
Another time I placed blue M&M’s in another coworker’s French coffee press. When he was away, I’d place them between the top of the filter and the lid of the container. He didn’t press down on the filter until the water was already in, so he wouldn’t find them until he poured the coffee. It took him a while to figure out how I got them into his cup.
I worked at a tech company. The guy beside me had a habit of accidentally collecting safety glasses on his desk… So whenever I had safety glasses I was done with I’d put them on his desk. This went on for months and he’d always be shocked by how many he’d collected when he did a desk clean.
I work on a production line for a car manufacturer. The guy a few spots down, when he doesnâ€™t do his job properly it makes my job harder and I end up having to fix his mistakes anyways.
So when ever I need to fart I just stand in front of the fan thatâ€™s pointed directly at him.
I have lady co-worker who writes lengthy emails to colleagues when she finds a mistake they made. It is time consuming and pointless. I know where she pulls the report to find the mistakes, so occasionally I pull the report, correct the errors myself and don’t tell her.
This sounds quite underwhelming here, but she loves to be a drama queen about all the “idiots” she has to correct but I spoil her fun.
Was with some programmers, we would put copies of a desktop sheep pet .exe file on the others’ computers and sneak something to run it somewhere in the startup. The sheep would just run around on the top of windows, you could get rid of it by right-clicking and closing the application. I put about 20 copies of it to run on another guy’s system, and he didn’t know that you could just end the task. He spent half a day constantly throwing sheep out of the way while he tried to do work before he finally asked for help.
My colleague left his screen unlocked, I went in to his email settings and changed the word ‘regards’ in his email signature to ‘retards’.
Screen capture the desktop, rotate image so it’s upside down and set as background. Hide desktop icons if there are any and start bar. Reverse mouse direction and then set graphics card to turn desktop upside down.
Late to the party, but I’m going to jump in here. Whenever I turn in a company vehicle for the night, I leave the radio on the Mexican polka station. I don’t speak Spanish at all.
On a windows machine, go into the mouse settings and enable “Click Lock”.
This changes a primary button click into a toggle on/off instead of the standard press and release for highlighting and click and drag operations.
It’s infuriating as hell and obscure enough that most people assume the mouse is broken and will request a new one. The new one will do it too.
Or just microwave some fish.
We have two microwaves in the break room that somebody needs the time to be the same on. I used to change the time on one by twenty minutes and wait for them to fix it. Now i change it by one minute everyday until they fix it and i start over.
I put a simple alarm clock in the ceiling tiles of the server room, so that every 12 hours, it would go off with a simple constant beep that would last about two minutes. I was in the room with my manager one of those times, and she went nuts when it went off. “Every day one of these machines has an alarm and I can’t figure out which one it is!!” She was frantically checking wires and buttons trying to find the source.
Very hard to stifle the laughter. This went on for about 4 months until another manager discovered the clock. He just left it on a desk with a post-it note that said “mad props”.
I move everything on their desks slightly to the left everyday. After a few days they notice “something” off but can’t tell what it is and it drives them nuts.
So our mens bathroom had a code to get in 123. For months whenever I entered or left the bathroom I would enter in a number in the keypad. If anyone went in after me, the code wouldn’t work the first time.
They actually had to remove the code after about a year.
At work, I am responsible for getting certain permits from the state. Once my permit is authorized, it is delivered to me via email in PDF format.
I grab 4 other similarly sized images from the internet which are inoffensive but vaguely, off color (like two lizards spooning).
Then, I email all five pictures to my foreman who needs the permit. He has to preview each PDF in order to find the permit that he needs.
Its a little game I like to call, “Permit Roulette”.
Bought a coworker a 2 year membership to a political party he really hates. He kept getting donation sollicitations and phone calls. Even got him a printed mug with the party leader’s face on it.
Often changed his name plate on the door to reflect that too.
-Senior Project Manager
-High knight of the crustacian federal party
-Champion of her majesty the prime minister
My dad stopped shaving and cutting his hair, just to see how far he could go before his boss said anything. My dad gave in after three years. He looked like a 50 year old Jesus.
I have to wear a hard hat for work. Sometimes Iâ€™ll scratch it as if I was scratching my head just to see if anybody notices.
The door to my shared office (me and my boss behind one door) has a cipher code rather than a key. Looks like this.
It’s 100% mechanical, and I always get into work before him. So I enter the correct code, enter the office, and “pre-enter” the wrong code. Then I close the door and wait for him to come to work.
Every time he tries the code, he “gets it wrong”. And has to do it twice.
I worked as an Expediter in a restaurant. One week I had a new person training so at the end of the night when we are cleaning I told the new girl to make sure she empties ALL the hot water from the coffee machine and dump it out. Little did she know it was just a hot water line connected to the coffee machine. She filled over 5 pitcher fulls of water before she figures it out! Everyone had a good laugh over it!
Printed out 9 pictures of Nicolas Cage, hid them throughout a coworkerâ€™s cubicle, then admitted it was me that hid 10 pictures of Nic Cage.
I don’t work in an office, but my dad tells me stories frequently of the ways he f*cks with his coworkers. The other day he said that he bought a bunch of car air fresheners and taped them to the bottom of a chair. The victim kept swiveling around trying to figure out the smell, but never checked under the seat. He said he put about 10+ air fresheners under it and the guy still never figured it out.
I used to mess with a former co-worker that was always rude to me. She had an earlier shift than I did, so after she would leave for the evening I would go to her desk and rearrange her pen cup so that the moment a pen was taken out the whole thing would fall over. I did this every night for about 2 weeks or so before she gave up and stopped using the pen cup but not before she threw the whole thing across her work area in a fit of rage.
on the stapler, I reverse the metal part that usually shapes the staple inward when you staple through the paper and make it face outward.
yeeeaaaaaa take that.
I leave haribo sugarfree gummy bears in the break room on days when I need a laugh.
My boss keeps pictures of his kids on his desk, when he’s gone, I replace them with photos of Owen Wilson.
There’s one guy who wears fedoras and claims to know EVERYTHING. So anytime somebody comes into my work with a hat on, no matter what kind, I comment on what a cool fedora it is. He then corrects me and gives the entire history of said hat.
Someone in our office was selling candy bars to raise money for her chuch. When she left her cubicle, she’d leave the box of candy there, alongside a box to put money in and a little sign she’d printed reading, “remember: God is watching. :)”
My friend printed up a sign and snuck it under her “God is watching…” sign. It read: “God helps those who help themselves.”
When they are copying or scanning something, I will secretly print 10 pages of blank paper at the same time. They think they are doing it.
I used to put butter and salt in the community coffee pot. After a couple weeks of doing it no one said anything so I put a little more each time(got to where i was dumping copious amounts of salt and butter in the coffee). Finally like a month later, the boss speaks up and says there is some “f*cking disgusting film” on his coffee, and everyone chimes in with “my coffee has tasted like ass the last few days” and “my coffee has been super salty tasting” and “ive had diarrhea from the coffee i think” so my boss decides to send the coffee company a mean email. (at this point its gone too far and everyone is pissed so i cant come clean). The coffee company responds with something along the lines of “sorry, some batches are bad and have a lot of oily film on them causing the coffee to taste salty or have a butter like film on it.” They apologize and we get free coffee for 6 months. Still to this day I cant be found out and think about it(chuckling to myself) almost daily. This was about 10 years ago.
I make up turns-of-phrase and wait for really good moments to use them in a group setting, then wait to see if I can make them catch-on, then watch them propagate through my company.
In the last 18 months, I’ve done:
Ham-Scanned (for briefly reviewing something and BSing your way through a meeting pretending you read it)
Licked-it (for when a manager changes one little thing on a piece of work someone else did, and pretends they made major contributions)
Whenever our ship went on deployment or a long underway, I would try to find the one person in berthing that was using the time to hit it hard at the gym. Everyone hangs their coveralls up at night with their belts still attached…so I’d just snip a tiny bit off the belt every week or so and watch them freak out when it was getting tighter as they ran 20 miles a week.
The lady at my dealership that sets up the Christmas decorations is a Christmas Nazi, everything needs to be perfect, the tree looks like one you’d see at a department store. It’s a fake tree with built in lights one set is color and one is white. We all said the colored ones are more fun and Christmasey, but she said that it had to be the white ones because she likes it better and if we change it to the milticolor she will change it back to white. So obviously I change it to muliticolor when I come in every day.
I pretend I’m a robot on the phone. Like a ship’s computer. Super neutral voice. I’ve been doing this for years. I don’t know that anyone’s picked up on it.
Read more: http://www.boredpanda.com/